My goal for jobs in the future is to be able to afford Julep, Ipsy and Birchbox subscriptions at the same time.
that girl u just called fat? she’s eatin some good fuckin food
that boy u laughed at for fallin asleep in class? he was up all night watching hentai
those kids who wear big dorky glasses? they don’t even need them wtf
those kids who never take out their headphones? they’re listening to Mitt Romneys autobiography. they paid $17.99 for it. they actually bought it.
Disney Parks commercial disclaimer:
Do not attempt unless you are a mermaid.
straight white boy problems
when ur at the gym getting PUMPED AS FUK & ur phone dies so u can’t listen to eminem’s “lose yourself”
- Thursday night: work on final papers
- Friday: out to lunch with coworkers then dinner with mom and grandma
- Saturday morning: clean the yoga studio then to Billy’s house for lunch then out with him to celebrate
- Sunday: Easter
- Monday: work on final papers
- Every day after: work on final papers